Breaking Free from Self-Sabotage: How to Identify and Overcome Fear’s Final Attempt to Stop You
Self-sabotage is the death throes of fear, so if you notice sabotaging patterns in yourself, it's time to get excited because you are almost there.
Almost.
Heidi, my friend and co-host of the Full of Ourselves podcast told me something that really stuck with me.
We have a general pattern for where self-sabotage shows up. Which one is you?
The beginning
If you self-sabotage at the beginning of a project you get a great idea and then get immediately overwhelmed and don't know where to begin. Many of us Good Girl personalities get overwhelmed and do move through it but if an idea doesn't even get out of the starting blocks this is you.
The middle
If you self-sabotage in the middle you are moving along OK with the project but eventually lose energy and momentum and stall out. Perhaps something new comes along and that's infinitely more exciting than this old idea and you suddenly switch your focus and ditch the project.
The end
You do all the work, it's ready to launch into the world, and the fear kicks in. What if this doesn't work? What if no one likes it? What if I've spent all this time and effort on it for nothing? And then you may not get it out there at all, or you may be just half-hearted with it. Share it once, and then don't talk about it again.
Identifying your self-sabotage pattern is the first step to overcoming it. Self-sabotage is fear in disguise. It's sneaky and may sound very reasonable. It says things like:
No, we don't have to do that.
But everyone is doing that now, let's move on to something else.
This might not work and you'll be devastated. Let's just not do our best and then we'll have an excuse when it doesn't work out.
The good news about self-sabotage is that it is fear's last resort.
Our fears are just there to try to keep us safe and maintain the status quo.
But if we are ever to do anything in our lives then we need to acknowledge the fear and do what we need to anyway because it's the only way through.
My self-sabotage pattern is ..
For me, the end of the project is where mine shouts the loudest. Just as I have finished and am ready to launch it to the world that fear kicks in. And I'm reminded of it this week because it's exactly what is happening to me.
I've spent this year working with my coaching and group clients, hearing what they want and need to grow their businesses and crafting resources to help them get there. It's been ready to share with you for a while and I've stalled out. The fear kicked in and I needed a bit of time to process it, thank it and do what I know is the right thing anyway.
The bottom line is that the Good Girls are ready to step out of the shadows of smashing it for everyone else and do it for themselves in their businesses.
To do that they have told me they need:
A plan - because wasting time doing things that aren't making a difference is draining their will and energy
Sales - they want to know how to make sales and connections
Confidence to charge correctly - because working hard for little return is not sustainable
Visibility - for their business to be seen, loved and bought from
Done-for-you marketing - because no one has time to reinvent the wheel
Is that what you need too?
If 2025 is your year to start or grow your own dream business on your own terms, check out the Good Girl Rebellion.
Starting on 6th January 2025, we will work together as a group for 6 months with a focus for each month, live masterclass to deep dive, planning and accountability sessions to keep you on track and ensure your business is unrecognisable on 1st July.
This has all my know-how from:
Being the Marketing Coordinator for a million pound a year business
Running my own over-subscribed business
My Sales Strategist accreditation
My knowledge of mindset from being a Psychology lecturer for a London university
And a decade of experience working with small businesses
If you're ready to prioritise yourself and your business in 2025, click the button above to find out more (including the early bird bonus available until 16th December).